Diana Darby ** "I V" ** Intravenous

Ambulance Chasers

I am starting to learn the difference
between the good lawyers and the bad lawyers.
The bad lawyers tell you what you want to hear.
They promise you huge sums of money.
They coddle you and tell you that the insurance company doesn’t give a damn about you
and that they won’t offer you a dime.
(unless of course, you hire them).
They scare you, but they never tell you anything about themselves
or what they’ve accomplished in the courtroom.
They offer to hop a plane,
drive you to their office,
take you to lunch,
anything short of putting you in an ambulance
and carrying you to them
so you can sign the dotted line
and they can get to work
(collecting your money for themselves).
Listening to them is like listening to George W. Bush.
Everything is good vs. evil.
Danger!
Fear!
Look out!
Code Orange!
No one knows what it’s supposed to mean
or what you’re supposed to be afraid of.
Just don’t carry water,
or wear lip gloss,
or have more than three ounces of anything liquid
in your suitcase
and you’ll be fine.
The good lawyers, on the other hand,
tell you the merits of your case.
They tell you the pros and the cons.
They let you know how the other guy is going to look at it
when you step into the courtroom.
They don’t promise you the moon.
They talk in realistic figures,
albeit less than you want to hear,
but believable.
They tell you things like,
“I’m not going to sugar coat this.”
And they ask pointed questions of you,
the kind of questions you’d be asked on the stand by your opponent.
“When did you first notice the pain?”
“How is it possible that it went away but now it’s back?”
“Couldn’t this just be degenerative disc disease?
Questions that make sense.
Questions that require a certain degree of thought.
Questions that George W. Bush would never ask.
I am so glad that in listening to our president for the last six years
I haven’t lost my ability to be able to detect the difference
between “good” vs. “evil”.
I haven’t gotten lost in a code orange colored haze
so deep that I can’t see the truth from the lies.
And for that I say,
"Thank you George W.
Thank you."